I can see what you're trying to do here, but I don't think it's working mix-wise.
I picked up 3 things which are a problem IMHO.
1) The highs are absolutely shredding my ears at anything above a low volume, and I'm listening on reference monitors. If you played this in a club at very hight volume people's ear drums would burst.
2) The main patch sounds massively over-compressed, unpleasantly so. It's completely squashing the mix.
3) The kick drum isn't coming through at all. I think you need to create some sonic space for the kick to punch through.