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  #1  
Old 2010-10-15, 22:14
pseudonym pseudonym is offline
 
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 8
Cold Answer - Prog House - Lookin for feedback

Well, this is my first post here. Finished up this prog house track that I REALLY think needs vocals. I think it would be a shame actually if it went uncompleted without vocals. The verses and break are kinda long and sparse (for vocals), so if you want to skip through them a bit, you won't hurt my feelings.

http://soundcloud.com/tjmann95/cold-answer

BTW, is there a way to embed soundcloud?
  #2  
Old 2010-10-16, 15:20
pseudonym pseudonym is offline
 
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 8
Nothing for the newbie?
  #3  
Old 2010-10-17, 00:49
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DIGITUS DIGITUS is offline
 
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I like the groove of this. It's very good especially for a newbie as you say. My only critiques are as follows.

1. Not much of an intro. It just kinda drops into the track full on with no lead in.

2. The track seemed to lose some of its groove around 2:09 when the keyboard fades and the clap becomes more prominent. The clap is playing such a simple rhythm that when it becomes a main focus it dulls the groove. I think the hi hat that comes in at 2:34 really adds the interest it needs to keep that syncopated feel. I'd bring the hi hat in or pull the clap back a bit at 2:09.

3. 10 mins is a really long song for even an established artist. It's rather self indulgent. As much as I fall in love with the sounds in some of my own tunes, I really try to keep things short and sweet. I aim for under 5 mins. Peoples attention spans are really short, and they're even shorter now that everyone and their mother's are producing music.

4 The synth swell at around 6:44 to 7:15 hurt my ears and caused me to reach for the volume to turn it down. Maybe a filter would help reduce harshness and shrill volume levels for that section.

5 On the upside, you've got a great progressive house sound going on. Keep in mind that the things not mentioned during a critique are most likely things that are actually working. So take note of that, and pat yourself on the back, and keep at it. I think you've got a knack for it. Anyways, that's my 2 cents and thanks for sharing your music...
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Last edited by DIGITUS; 2010-10-17 at 00:52.
  #4  
Old 2010-10-17, 01:10
pseudonym pseudonym is offline
 
Join Date: Jul 2010
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Thanks for replying. Yeah, I am certainly not the self-indulging type, but this one just got away from me. I took out the intro because it was longer. I'll go back and shorten the break a lot and cut the verses in half. I'll also go back and reduce the freq on the filter automation and put in the hi hat where the groove dulls. Thanks a lot for your help!
  #5  
Old 2010-10-17, 01:26
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DIGITUS DIGITUS is offline
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by pseudonym View Post
Thanks for replying. Yeah, I am certainly not the self-indulging type.
I am...lol. It's natural when it comes to music production, but I'm learning to edit things down.

Quote:
Originally Posted by pseudonym View Post
Thanks a lot for your help!
You're welcome...
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  #6  
Old 2010-10-17, 04:03
malikjo malikjo is offline
 
Join Date: Mar 2009
Posts: 7
really awesome chord progression.
nice sounds... sounds a bit muddy in some places though.
definitely needs vocals. with that accompaniment it should be super easy.
its too long. i did skip through a bunch
another thing...
all of your main sounds are in the same register... what i would recommend doing is basically 'filling the whole spectrum' and adding a voice way up high... perhaps take that one guitarish sounding melody and take it up 2 or so octaves, put some delay and a huge reverb on it, and mix it in subtly in the climaxy places. but thats just what i would do.
yeeup.
good job there bud.
  #7  
Old 2010-10-17, 06:17
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jfrichards jfrichards is offline
 
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Posts: 2,032
Hi pseudonym,

Here is a guitar track for your piece:

http://soundcloud.com/john-richards/strat-layer

It's me playing some Stratocaster/Marshall ambience stuff in a wav file that can be downloaded and imported into a Record audio track. You can chop it up and use it however you like (make loops, add delay, etc.), or not. I was just having a little fun with your song. No need for credits, it came out of your cool little piece.
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  #8  
Old 2010-10-17, 13:24
pseudonym pseudonym is offline
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by malikjo View Post
perhaps take that one guitarish sounding melody and take it up 2 or so octaves
Do you mean the piano melody or the deadmau5 style stabs?

@jfrichards Wow man. Thanks a lot. I will definitely see how it fits.

Last edited by pseudonym; 2010-10-17 at 13:29.
  #9  
Old 2010-10-17, 14:29
malikjo malikjo is offline
 
Join Date: Mar 2009
Posts: 7
meh, it doesn't matter really, you could do both or neither, whichever.
the important part of my advice was just the technique itself, and not so much how you should use it specifically
  #10  
Old 2010-10-18, 03:08
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KIBEJA KIBEJA is offline
 
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Hey,

I like this and feel too that it needs some further development. A vocal would absolutely be a grand addition but you could add in some sparkle to it as well. Use some high elements and perhaps pan them in different ways to imply movement. It helps to expand your stereo field and keeps the ear involved in the tune. Just a thought.

Nice stuff!

Chris
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